Have you ever uttered the words “I hate this”?
I have.
It usually comes up when I can’t do something.
In my case, it might be when I’m faced with a DIY issue at home. I’ve told myself for years that I hate DIY.
The truth is, I’m not very good at it for a few reasons:
- I don’t believe I ever had a natural aptitude for it or interest in it when I was a kid.
- As a result, I’ve not done much of it.
- So whenever I attempt it, with the words “I hate this” going through my head, I don’t commit to it, don’t usually do it very well and often end up just reinforcing all those beliefs and proving myself right.
Have you ever followed that same thought process yourself?
As you grow your business you’re continually bumping up against new situations and challenges that you’ve never faced before.
Maybe you tell yourself you’re a great adviser but you’re not very good at all the business management stuff or the recruitment and HR issues.
Or you’re great with clients but no good with compliance.
Does telling yourself these things make them true?
Only if you want them to be.
Like me with DIY, I can make it a self-fulfilling prophecy, or I can dig in and learn some new skills.
When a business problem is difficult, it often presents as one thing (the symptom), but solving it will require you to work on something completely different (the cause).
That can be confusing initially. The internal dialogue says, “Why aren’t the things I’m trying making a difference?”
And eventually, if left unaddressed it can become totally frustrating.
Scott Young, author of Ultralearning: Accelerate Your Career, Master Hard Skills and Outsmart the Competition says:
“I hate this,” isn’t a feeling—it’s a sentence. It’s a sentence you mentally utter in automatic response to certain things going on in your environment. However, recognize that this isn’t a single, unified experience, but several discrete experiences happening in lockstep:
- You notice you’re doing something badly.
- You notice that others may notice you’re doing something badly.
- You feel embarrassed, and start to feel bad.
- You feel like you need to escape or stop.
- You say to yourself, “I hate this.”
The important thing to recognise is that this internal dialogue is common to everyone. It’s not just you.
Once you recognise it, you can change it, if you want to.
Why would you bother?
Dealing with the challenges in your business and your life is worth the effort. However, you’ll only bother making an effort because you have a goal that requires you to.
If you’ve got a business goal that really means something, you dig in and try to find the answers that will allow you to grow.
How committed you’ll be depends on the size and importance of the goal.
What’s the payoff?
A feeling of satisfaction.
When a challenge or issue arises in your business, dealing with the real issue changes your life for the better.
But there’s work involved.
Not dealing with the issue feels better in the short-term because someone else can be blamed and there’s no work involved, but it doesn’t improve your business or your life in any way.
When you front-up to difficult issues the payoff is improved self-confidence as you learn that you can solve them and see a better life ahead.
“The hard way is the easy way.”
Scott Young
Let me know how you go.
How would you do things, if doing them well were all that mattered?
Here are some great resources.
Watch this brilliant keynote presentation from Scott Young talking about the five key lessons from his decade of ultralearning research.
My favourite part is when Scott and his college roommate go travelling for a year and make a rule when they land in a new country; no speaking English. They only speak the native language the second they get off the plane. Watch it and find out what happens.
I also highly recommend Scott’s book, Ultralearning: Accelerate Your Career, Master Hard Skills and Outsmart the Competition.
Want some help with your own business?
If your challenges are business-related, then some external help can make all the difference. A mentor or coach can help you to cut through all of the noise and get you working on the right issue (i.e. the cause, not the symptom).
If you want “Brett in your pocket” join my Uncover Your Business Potential Online community.
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Once you’re a member you can download the UYBP-Online App and ask me a question whenever you want. I’ll be back to you with a solution in a jiffy. It’s ultralearning for financial planners.
When you front-up to difficult issues the payoff is improved self-confidence
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